Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs puts the need to feel loved at #3 from the top. It is clear that us humans for sure must have a place to always turn to to get that love, respect, and unconditional acceptance. When we are not receiving those things, we start acting very unusual and behave sporadically. Good people turn bad. People start acting differently. Some people turn into criminals, and do things that no decent human being would even imagine doing. And others develop major self esteem issues and depression. All because the simple need of feeling loved and cared for was missing.
I do believe that many of us with anxiety disorder do have a void in this area. I can for sure speak for myself, that a big issue of mine is that I don’t feel accepted and respected. I never did since childhood, which is why I would basically try anything just to get a little bit of that acceptance, respect, and approval from others. I went through different phases in my life, trying to “fit in” or be looked up to by others, even if it wasn’t the way I felt or what I would have done on my own. But alas, the void remained.
I tried being “nice” to people, so they wouldn’t make fun of me. I tried being silly and making people laugh so they would stop disrespecting me. I would try to wear the cool clothes to try to fit in with the cool people. I would pretend I knew stuff when I didn’t so they wouldn’t see me as an idiot and a clueless loser and continue to disrespect me. And the list goes on and on.
How can we fill that void? What do we do to feel loved? Is it to just find somebody who likes us, and then try harder to make them like us, and do what makes them happy? Sorry, been there done that. It doesn’t work. The REAL ANSWER: Turning your HEART to Al-Wadood (The Most Loving) Al-Rabb (The One Who Cares). Believe in these two names to the core bottom of your heart. Let’s see if that fills that void in our hearts that has been there for so many years.