Let’s look at the series of events I went through the other day. Follow me here:
1. I overslept and missed my witr prayer
2. I get up and remember that I’m supposed to feel bad, because “the Sahabah would regret for one year after missing witr about oversleeping.” So I have to feel more regretful and upset and analyze all my faults and shortcomings and keep repenting to Allah
3. All that pressure on top of my anxiety filled life increases my feelings of depression and demotivation
4. In my heart I’m not looking forward as much to pray, even though I know I must do it.
5. My love and raghbah for Allah and Islam goes down, because I feel forced and pressured, and feel that this is the way the “righteous are.”
6. I feel despair that I don’t love Allah like I’m supposed to, and because of this, I’m probably a mushrik, because Allah said they don’t have much love for Allah compared to the believers.
7. I must not be a believer.
8. I fall into more despair and want to give up.
This is a typical series of thought processes that our close companion Shaitan takes us on. As I mentioned in The Footsteps of Shaitan, It is all trickery and deception, disguised as wanting to be a good muslim. Shaitan knows our weaknesses, and will exploit them in any way necessary. The ultimate objective of the devil: To make us hate Allah, and to make us disbelievers. He wants us to follow his way and his path, the path that leads to hellfire.
كَمَثَلِ الشَّيْطَانِ إِذْ قَالَ لِلْإِنسَانِ اكْفُرْ فَلَمَّا كَفَرَ قَالَ إِنِّي بَرِيءٌ مِّنكَ إِنِّي أَخَافُ اللَّهَ رَبَّ الْعَالَمِينَ
Similar to Shaitan, when he said to the human “disbelieve”, then when he disbelieved, he said, “I am completely dissociated from you, indeed, I fear Allah, the Lord of the worlds.”
Alhamdulillah for knowledge and guidance, because Allah guides us out of the darkness into the light.