بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
يقص الله تعالى عن يعقوب لأبنائه في سورة يوسف
قال هل آمنكم عليه كما أمنتكم على أخيه من قبل فالله خير حافظا و هو أرحم الراحمين
He said, “Will I entrust you with him, just like I entrusted you with his brother from before? Allah is a better protector and the most lovingly compassionate of the compassionate. 12:64
As I have mentioned before, Surah Yusuf is more than anything capturing the experience of those who developed psychological problems and self esteem issues.
After the brothers who were “quote unquote” “protecting” the first child that they devoured like a wolf, they come again with the same plea and promise that they will be very protective of the 2nd child. In response Father Yaqub عليه السلام expresses his sentiment: “Do you actually expect me to trust you just like I trusted you before?”
Now this ayah is so moving to the psychologically scarred. Those who had a parent with their own emotional baggage; maybe a parent with OCD, depression, bipolar, GAD, whatever it may be. They spoiled and were very overprotective with their “precious baby”. They looked like the model parent. They “did” literally everything for them, and in the process forgot to let the child do stuff for themselves. They wanted the model child because it made them feel good and they fulfilled their own void through living through their kids.
So the loving, overprotective parents see their child has major depression, severe self esteem problems. And then they start helping out, and wanting to make things better. But little do they know that hey were the cause to begin with. Then they come and say, “you have a brain disease,” you need to take these SSRI medications. And then after trying it, and feeling much worse, and feeling your condition becoming even more disabled, you tell them that it’s not helping. But they get upset that their advice and counsel is not being respected and followed. Because as they say, “Mommy knows best.” “We will never tell you something wrong.” or “Why don’t you ever listen to your parents who love you for a change?”
And as the child is realizing where their issues actually developed; that the depression, low self esteem and ocd actually came from the unhealthy relationship with mom, then and only then does this ayah come alive and brings tears of relief and understanding to the depressed soul of self esteem wounds.
“Do you expect me to trust you again, after I was in your care and trust in the first place, which caused me to develop the condition I have? You want me to take your advice on curing my depression when it was my relationship with you that caused my depression in the first place?!?! God is far more protecting, and much more loving. Let me get my heart in the right place, after it was misplaced with you. “
That’s how the cookie crumbles.